:-: What will I doo..

What will I doo... this was a common question I heard from people, who had issues in their married life.




Lets look retro


Definition of Divorces : A legal dissolution of the marriage contract by a court or other body having competent authority. This is properly a divorce, and called, technically, divorce a vinculo matrimonii. 

Divorce has been here for a long period of time. The difference of application of Divorce, say 20 yrs back and now is: earlier it was rare - now its is there for everything. Its a common practice now a days. 

Its quiet common that when two individuals live together there are situations where they cannot come under a common ground. 

Everything starts with a small problem. As time goes on, issues will pile up on to the top of the previous ones, which will end up as a mountain of issues. Hatred is created among them. It will drive into a situation where in they cannot continue any further - Yes its time to separate. 

I totally agree with this. If two parties cannot continue to share the mutual understanding - instead of making things worst, they can agree to come out of it.

But what if these parties have a child. What will he/she do. How are they going to take this...

Parents are responsible FOR and TO their children.  I would say they should also be consulted in taking the final verdict.

The only situation in which I support for Divorce is: 

Either one of the parties are acting dangerous to the existence of the other party. Rest of the problems have solutions...

The Society plays different roles in the life of these people. 99% of individuals, up on listening to any family issues jumps into the decision of Divorce. But never,  looks deep into the real issue...

In the last One year - I have heard about a couple of family problems.  I slowly started to look into the details. On close analysis, I was able to understand that :

Both of them :

1. Have Good education
2. Work for MNC's and are earning a Good salary and necessary financial backup
3. Their family back grounds are good.
4. They represent happiness in front of the society

But these had been their in personal: 

1. They never Communicated each other of what they want from this relationship 
2. One was Expecting that the other should do his or her needs  & wishes 
3. Added to that, they never shared these issues with the people who can provide a Wise decisions (The people with who they shared was whom, cannot handle their own personal issues. :) )
4. No Patience in dealing sensitive issues
5. No Love and Full of Hatred to the others.
6. Under the influence of Some, who will be there to take advantage of this situation. 
7. Personal Ego's etc etc..
8. Elders are not involved or shared with these issues, assuming this will hurt them.

 I look all these as tragedies.

What all things I can do 

I advised some to 

1. Speak each other with patience and love. 
2. Try to understand each others expectations.
3. Put away the ego
4. Think about the good times which they spend together before getting into unnecessary talks
5. Share issues with elders, and take advices. 
6. Keep some good company - discuss with them
7. Realize that they are here for a purpose...

I can see improvements in their personal living... after a couple of months.

Happy Love life....